On not updating.

Well, I'd set myself some lofty goals this season to be sure. Is it possible for one man to update a football blog at least one day a week with picks and maybe a few interesting news items? For me, apparently not. Hell, what's the point anymore? The Patriots just keep on keepin' on. This is the blackest of football seasons for me. I hate the Patriots. I hate smug Beantown fucks. I hate hate hate the idea of New England going 19-0 this year. Sweet bleeding Jesus is it really down to the Dolphins and the Giants?

And it's the fucking bandwagon fans that kill me. The fucking stuck-up bitch at the bar who wouldn't serve me because my driver's license had expired? Wearing a Patriots hat. The chillax stoner server who later that same night brought pitcher after pitcher, shot after shot and thus earned himself a $10 tip on a $20 tab? Not wearing any sports team hat, but probably a fan of the Hurricanes. You do the math.

A friend of mine who's a Dolphins fan said he doesn't care that much about protecting the '72 Dolphins' record. I told him I couldn't care less about the '72 Dolphins. I just don't want the Patriots up there, too. Shit, let's have 31 teams up there. The Pats stay down. Fuck 'em. Forever.

Buccaneers fans, Browns fans, Indians fans, Phillies fans, and (I almost hate to say it) die-hard BoSox fans should be forming lynch mobs, patrolling the sports bars and living rooms for suspiciously new Patriots jerseys and hats. You don't get to root for a team just because a) they're winning now and b) you once had a 12-hour layover at Logan and your cousin's step-brother married a girl from Providence.

The best thing to come out of Boston was The Departed, and some of that was filmed in Brooklyn, so rim me, Beantown.

A final note: Any player who takes out Tom Brady for the season will get a $25 gift certificate to Applebee's, courtesy of Footlawl.