Week 9 predictions

Sunday
Atlanta at Detroit - Holy shit, Michael Vick out of fucking nowhere.

Cincinnati at Baltimore - The Ravens are 50-50 playing against teams with winning records (Chargers, Broncos, Panthers, Saints for W, L, L, W).

Dallas at Washington - Big fucking rivalry game; big fucking deal.

Green Bay at Buffalo - The Packers are awful. So are the Bills.

Houston at N.Y. Giants - Easy pick.

Kansas City at St. Louis - The Rams win in a Wild West shootout, 94-93.

Miami at Chicago - I will be taking a nap during this game.

New Orleans at Tampa Bay - Sigh. I'm getting the Antoine Cash jersey for my birthday. I'll wear it with my "U" hat for extra shame.

Tennessee at Jacksonville - David (Steve?) Garrard (Garraud?) is starting. That's a good thing.

Minnesota at San Francisco - Superbowl-winning QB Brad Johnson versus the Tiniest Hands in the League.

Cleveland at San Diego - The Browns are terrible.

Denver at Pittsburgh - Two (more) concussions for Roflberger. The Donkos D is gonna have a fucking field day for INTs.

Indianapolis at New England - My God I'm glad this game isn't the Monday Night game. Joe Theismann would spend 3 hours gulping down quarterback cum non-fucking-stop. As it is, there's gonna be a lot of cock-gobbling QB love. Also: laser, rocket arm.

Monday
Oakland at Seattle - Well. It's good to know I can go to bed early Monday.